Good Night, and Good Luck!

"I've always thought that, but nothing seems to make it to the butcher any more." I was telling the bartender.

"Well, that's because blue is his favorite color, not red now." he explained.

"Exactly. So why try to get me to make paper-mache heads of Walter Kronkite?"

"Because a kaleidoscope can be turned in either one direction or the other."

"Oh, just like hamburger? Or is it more like a partridge in a pear tree?"

"Personally, I prefer the "no nonsense" method, but if Chutes and Ladders works for you, then run with it. And run fast."

"That reminds me of a story," I said, pausing for another swig. "A friend of mine was writing on a mirror, trying to figure out a difference between pelicans and Formica. No matter what he did, he just couldn't find anything significant. So he went and bought a shoe horn, and taped it to his left foot. This made a clicking sound, which echoed like a duck. Naturally, he called to it, and found a quarter on the sidewalk. He asked the pharmacist if the quarter was legal, and was given the O.K. to start building. By the time the project was finished, it was level. Can you believe that?"

"No, I can't," said the bartender, "But it sure puts some pepper in your petunias, to say the least."

"I know. Trust me, I know. No one knows more about plastic fruit than me. *sigh* Just one more thing before I go. Can you get there from here?"

"Of course not. Everyone knows that. Ask anyone, and they'll tell you. There are just too many improbabilities, its low tide, the locusts are out and about, kids have a way of finding out, and its not your destination anyway. Don't forget the bread."

"Thanks, I almost did. Next time I'm in, I'll register the pine trees - how's that?"

"Sounds fine. I can always use a new pair of hamster wheels. Thanks. Good Night, and Good Luck!"

With a "You too!", I floated away.


The moral of the story?